Parenting is one of the hardest jobs on earth. Children do not come with a user manual that tells you how to troubleshoot their problems and keep them functioning properly. Most of what we learn about parenting, we learn by observation and by trial and error. Sometimes it feels like more error than trial. It can be downright discouraging for a father who sincerely wants to be a good dad but doesn’t know where to even start.

Although children do not come with a user manual, we have the Bible, God’s Word, which provides us with plenty of directions, including guidance on how to be a good dad and common “fatherly follies” that dads need to avoid.

One common mistake dads make is showing favoritism to one child over another. If you have more than one child, this is always a risk. Jacob committed this folly when he showed favoritism to Joseph, making family life even more complicated and frustrating than it already was.

Another mistake is the failure to discipline your children correctly. Children are sinners, and they need the strong love of a father who will chasten them when they step out of line. Eli failed to discipline his sons, and the results were unthinkably horrible.

A third “fatherly folly” is seen in the example of King David. When it came to being a dad, David was disengaged, and his leadership was quite feeble. One pointed passage says of his son, Adonijah, “And his father had not displeased him at any time in saying, Why hast thou done so?” Such indulgence and lack of intervention results in children who are spoiled and entitled.

This is certain: fathers need God’s help to be the kind of dads we ought to be. By the grace of God, we can avoid these follies, and bring our children up “in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.”